Sunday, May 22, 2011

Pathological Liar - A future letter from my Daughter....

By ~tas-poetry

It is no mystery
That your lips only speak of fictional stories
You use to compose your identity
Not a word you speak has any resemblance with truth
For you are made of a thick fa├žade of lies
Whether it be big or small, you care not
As long as there is no glimpse of honesty
Underlying in the words you speak
For the revelation of truth is what you fear most

I know that those lies masquerade
An overt denial of unpleasant realities
I know that deep down you are a tormented soul
That lies provide you with relief
A relief you long for
I know that you are a stranger in your own body
But you have lost all credibility now
Your lies are inconsistent
You are no longer a father
But a manipulative man
That only breeds chaos in our family

Your deception is no longer welcome
You, Dad, are no longer welcome in my life
Now it is my time to neglect you
The way you neglected me
For the way you abused my mother
For the emptiness you have left in my heart
As I grew up without a father
For all the promises you have broken deliberately
But even more so, for making promises
That you had no intention on keeping

Yes, I know that you use lies
To cover up the dirt of your insecurities
And I know that when you left me
You knew you left a big part of you
In the wilderness to grow up
Without fifty percent of the guidance I needed
But my mother and I are better off without you
Because you are too stubborn to admit the guilt
You feel in a small space in your heart
You are too arrogant to admit your faults
And you have too much pride
To apologize
And even if you did
It would be a lie
Because that has become your nature

You are the oxygen that abandoned my lungs
You are the blood that escaped my heart
And every time I pass my reflection in the mirror
I see you
The ugliness of you
That I inherited
I have all the physical attributes you have
Our faces are identical
But even worse
I have your mind
Your insecurities
Your stubbornness
Your emotional immaturity
Your weaknesses
I am ugly because of you

But there are things that I am proud of
I have compassion
Sensitivity
The ability to respect
The ability to love
None of which you have
But all of which my mother has taught me
The beautiful woman you married
The woman you scarred
And yes the woman that survived
All of your abuse and emotional torture
The woman that has taught me the meaning of inner strength
The woman you imprisoned for years
Who finally escaped
From the bars of your lies
She is my inspiration
My idol
My mother

And most importantly
I am proud
That I speak the truth
And if I do not speak the truth
Then I refuse to speak at all
A quality you will never have
I am better than you, Dad
And I cannot forgive you
Because that would be betraying
The woman that raised me
The woman that loved me
The woman that gave me all that you didn’t


You're a pathological liar. ~tas-poetry on @deviantART http://t.co/jUqSvi0

Want a good laugh???  Check out the comments below from an "Anonymous" poster who for some reason feels the need to defend a man who hasn't seen his kids in nearly 4 years!  There's always one!  ;)

19 comments:

  1. How powerful the poem that wrings the hurt and the anger from the soul.

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  2. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger...I admire your courage and strength to find a better life for your family. You have shown them the light they would have never known.

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  3. The past is behind, learn from it. The future is ahead, prepare for it. The present is here, live it.

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  4. Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.

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  5. Hanging onto resentment is letting someone you despise live rent-free in your head.

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  6. Let go. Why do you cling to pain? There is nothing you can do about the wrongs of yesterday. It is not yours to judge. Why hold on to the very thing which keeps you from hope and love?

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  7. You have serious problems. Too bad you feel that this will be in your daughter's future. But, I guess some people simply cannot let go of the past....your life is lacking for whatever reason, and I feel so sorry for your current husband...to know that you still (no matter what) bring up the past.....my gosh what he must be feeling......it's really funny though, that you continue down this path......i feel such pity for you, your children and especially your husband. I just bet that you are one of those people who can't stand being in control of every situation...including your ex-husbands. TOO FUNNY!!!! I"m sure that his Blog (for how could he not have one) is amazing!

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  8. To the last "anonymous"...you are a coward that is playing juvenile games with an ex only to be laughed at and belittled secretly for your lack of prowess, I mean, personality. Same thing, right? This person's blog is obviously talking about her daughter's daily life and her daughter's lack of parental involvement from their sperm donor, I mean, birth father. If that clock is accurate, pathetic doesn't even scratch the surface. The fact that you would defend this animal doesn't shock me, because most male animals care nothing for their young once they reach adolescent because they are considered a threat. What shocks me is how much effort you put in to saying absolutely nothing. You think you are being profound and it just comes off as someone trying to sound educated. I went back and read some of your other “gems” and you obviously have a bone to pick with this person or you are incredibly ignorant. No one defends a person that hasn't seen their children in...(fill in counter time whenever you are reading this) unless all of this is hitting really close to home. Personally, I wouldn’t let my kids be in the same zip code of this piece of...umm, let’s go with, work. For, it is, he who obviously hasn’t moved on because he refuses to have a relationship with his children instead choosing to have a relationship with his bottle (I’m sorry, I was trying to sound like “anonymous” but it just doesn’t suit me). It must be awesome to walk around in a world with no mirrors...that way you would never have to see how ugly you really are. I guess there really are people out there that will just say anything when they can hide behind “ANONYMOUS”. Got to love the internet :)

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  9. You're funny and totally idiotic! Bless your heart for your comments. Pity you and the person who owns this blog. Funny!!!! One sided??? HAHAHAHA - piece of scum? Have you met her ex-husband, did you see first hand anything that she has posted (well, wait other than her comments)........it's really odd that the person who owns this blog, would CONSTANTLY be posting about her ex-husband...sounds like someone who can't let go of the past. Good comments from you, Aggie.....hmmmm...that explains a lot......you poor-uneducated fool........LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!! GOOD BLESS YOU....hmmmmm....did you ever wonder if the person who owns this blog could be preventing any contact?????? Read again all of the BLOG comments and you will notice a patter with her blog postings.....LOLOLOLOLOLOL

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  10. bottle???? AGGIE - have you seen first hand anything that would back up the claims that her ex has a bottle? Funny - f rom her pictures and postings it appears as though the Owner of this Blog HAS A MAJOR DRINKING PROBLEM.


    GOD BLESS YOU ALL

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  11. Yes, I do have "first hand knowledge" of this person and her struggles with her ex. He will be judged for what he has done to his ex wife and children, yet blames them for leaving him when he refused and still refuses to seek help for his problem with alcohol. She has moved on with a wonderful man who thinks she deserves to have a voice. You would have her be quite and hang on to all of her pain. She has moved on with a family that loves her and the man she always dreamed of. Frankly, this sperm donor isn't worth the time I am taking to write this but, again I do have "first hand knowledge" and you are a jerk who has absolutely nothing to do but defend the indefensible. Nicole has begged her birth father to come see her and her therapist, yet he is too busy looking for a job (this “father”/Dad of the Year has been out of work for going on 5 years and has his retired parents pay his child support then complains about how much money he has to pay every month) or the new one, “I don’t believe in therapy”. I have personally wiped Nicole’s tears away after the horrible things her “father” has told her and thinks what he says is appropriate to a 10 year old. I guess I should ask you Mr./Mrs. Anonymous if you have any "first hand" experience with the owner of this blog. Please continue to defend a “man” that sucks his mommy and daddy dry while refusing to admit he has a problem and seek help. Wow, 3 post before I even respond. Now that is stalker material. Maybe you are her ex acting like a woman because you can’t have a 2 min conversation with your daughter. Now, was that a little close to home?

    GOD BLESS YOU AS WELL, I HOPE GOD OPENS YOUR EYES TO THE EVILS OF THIS WORLD

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  12. Good one....No, I have no feelings or first hand knowledge about the above. Poor thing.......hmmmm....if you have first hand knowledge then you must be the same person who owns this blog.....geesh - how sad...as for what her ex is doing w/or w/out a job...who cares.......yes, she has a voice but as you say 5 years??? come on......how long does a person need to stay on the same topic.....as for the child support - who cares how the money is being paid - she's getting it correct? I wouldn't be complaining if she continues to get that money. MOst ex-wives don't, and never will...so be thankful for that........how mature to refer to "mommy and daddy" as I've said - doesn't matter who pays for it, as long as she is getting it .....just be satisified that she's getting it .........Stalker - NO, it's called "responding to blog posts." Evils of the world??? Get a life and read the bible.......then comment....GOD BLESS YOU AND ALL OF THOSE THINGS THAT YOU HAVE DONE WRONG IN YOUR LIFE...AND MAY GOD SHINE HIS LIGHT DOWN UPON YOU AND GIVE YOU THE STRENGTH TO MOVE ON!.

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  13. I"m so glad that she has a family who loves her, that is wonderful news. MOVE ON, GROW UP, AND BEFORE POSTING information about someone who has a problem (I don't care anything about her ex, or what he has/has not done), make sure you own closest is neat and tidy.....for false information can only lead to future hurt.

    GOD BLESS YOU, Aggie - Thank you for your comments. It helps others to "understand" the REAL situation.

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  14. So often we simply don't want to accept what has happened. When mistakes are made, we tend to resist, telling ourselves that things should have gone another way. Resistance causes inner turmoil, robbing us of peace in our day-to-day lives. Acceptance brings peace. Learning from past experience is important, of course, but replaying things over and over again just binds us to old hurt, guilt and anger. With awareness and acceptance, we find that the hurtful situation loses its hold on us, and we are free to move on.

    Forgiveness is a common stumbling block. We don't want to let others off the hook for hurt or pain we feel they caused us. But forgiveness begins and ends in our own consciousness. We forgive in order to free ourselves from the bondage of judgment and anger

    "As long as we hold harsh or unforgiving thoughts, we cannot be an open channel for the receptivity of good. They who are unforgiving harm themselves rather than the object of their condemnation, for the hate generated operates only within themselves and leaves its effect solely upon them.


    Good Luck in your future journey, and I hope that you get the peace that you so depearately need.

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  15. To Anonymous: I don’t know you and I do not care for you. How do you know that the owner of this blog has not moved on? I know for a fact that she has. If you have read any of her post, she is writing about what her daughter is going through, not what she is/has gone through. But obviously you have not comprehended any of that. I know for a fact that she has moved on and has “let go” of her past. The only reason she even attempts to have any kind of contact with her ex and his family is because of her girls. They have a right to know who their biological father is, no matter kind of father he was. Nicole is at the age where she is curious and wants to know her biological father, but he doesn’t make any type of effort to see his own daughter. Imagine how Nicole feels every time her “daddy” promises to come and see her, but never does?! Image what she had to tell her girls every time their “daddy” was drunk and stumbling around…. How do you explain that to a 4 year old?! I admire her for her attempts at trying to get her ex to have some kind of relationship with his daughter. She is not doing this for herself, TRUST me on that!
    I also have “firsthand knowledge” about the trials and tribulations that she has overcome with her ex-husband. I was there when she was going through it. I know what he did to her, and how he treated her. I know that is has been hard to even think about keeping in contact with the drunken looser, but she is doing it because her baby girl wants to know her biological father. When she is older and if she is ever able to have any kind of relationship with her sperm donor, Nicole will come to realize what type of a person he really is. Right now she is curious and who can blame her? It isn’t that she doesn’t have a wonderful family and A REAL FATHER who knows more about her young life than her sperm donor does, or ever has or ever will! She has a right to know her biological father, and I admire the owner of this blog for her attempts at trying to help Nicole get to know her sperm donor, because she doesn’t have to… did he ever attempt to see his girls during the divorce….. that would be a HUGE NEGATIVE!!!

    I know that she has a wonderful husband now that has treated her girls like they were his own! He has been a better father to her girls than her ex could ever have been! Not to mention a BETTER husband!

    You keep blogging girl and don’t let these “Anonymous” posters get you down! You are doing an awesome job!!!

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  16. Again - were you there to see any of the actual "stumbling around?" Maybe the OWNER OF THIS BLOGG SHOULD PAY ATTENTION TO HER OWN DRINKING (STUMBLING, SLURRING, ETC).. Your first hand knowledge could be just what has been RELAYED by this blogger. In any case, I do not care, do not care about you, the blogger or anything that may or may not have happened. I am respoding to a blog......all opinions are open for discussion...if there is a problem, then don't have a blog. Time will tell, and any lies will be known. As for her husband, again I feel sorry for him as by his question to her on an earlier post. A better husband, maybe so...if he is then maybe the blogger could spend less time on her ex and his family and concentrate on her and the future of her children. Yes, continue to blog, and if anonymous posters are getting her down...then MAYBE she needs to look at what she's posting...... I"ve enjoyed reading your comments!! OPINIONS ARE GREAT are they not????!!! IN any case, keep on keep on..GOD BLESS YOU AND MAY THE LIGHT SHINE UPON YOU TOO.!

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  17. I find it so hypocritical to wax on philosophically for paragraphs when you do not even have the courage to say who you are. Honestly, if this person's ex-husband felt the same as you do in your last post (can't tell if Anonymous is all the same person or not) this blog wouldn’t even exist. This blogger's ex husband is so full of hate and anger he can’t even have a 2 min conversation with his daughter without being inappropriate or making her cry. I really wish her ex would find the book that you are plagiarizing, I mean, quoting; I think he would find it extremely helpful in his battle with alcoholism. This blog was obviously started to help people in similar situations, not bash anyone. This “man”, that claims to be a father but continues to let his pride defeat him, shows no humility or remorse for what he has done and said, just acting like it never happened, common practice among alcoholics. “Anonymous” you have instead tried to turn this into a forum of preaching and judging everything posted by this blogger. Not once has anonymous recognized how horrible a person this family has to deal with on a daily basis, how much pain their daughters feel when their whole family has abandoned them because they choose a drunk (blood may be thinker than water, but these grandparents, aunts and uncles are punishing the children for the wrongs of the father), or how all of this has affected this blogger. Compassion and empathy are to very interesting words you may want to google. And yes, you are a stalker because you post 3 and 4 times after one post, trying to make it look like its 3 different people. Your ignorance is transparent and you obviously are attacking this blogger like her ex-husband did and still does on a daily basis. How can you "MOVE ON" when your daughter constantly asks why her father has abandoned her or when you receive text messages about refusing “to pay for kids he doesn’t get to see”? Who says that? They are children not a time share. Should this blogger, just through caution to the wind and let her children experience this abusive, paranoid, border line psychotic behavior first hand? Since you have all the answers, “Anonymous”, please help me with that one. Food for thought: Nicole's therapist has recommended that she only communicate with her "birth father" through letters after hearing one 5 min exchange. That's all it took for a medical professional to see that this animal has no interest in his children, he just wants to hurt his ex any way possible and since he can’t abuse her anymore, he is gonna start in on the kids. Not my words, words of a MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL, or is “Anonymous” a PHD in child psychology, as well. This blogger has obviously moved on, it is her children she is protecting from an abusive and tormented human that has refused to move on after 5 years of separation. This blogger is looking for assurance and guidance in a very difficult circumstance that her ex husband created with his addition to alcohol, not misguided and uneduacted criticism and ridicule from a total stranger. I sure wish her ex could read some of your stuff about moving on, or it could just be her ex being psycho, like usual. Doesn't everyone put nails under their ex wife’s tires right before she takes his children on a long trip to the lake? Forgiveness comes from the heart, forgetting comes from the brain. This blogger will find it very hard to forgive, when her ex-husband actively tries to destroy her children’s innocence with every word he speaks/writes, never forgetting that a leopard rarely changes his spots.


    And I am not the author of this blog or I would have blocked your ignorant ass a long time ago, feel luck she allows you to have a voice. I use my gmail account info, please leave your email address so I can contact you directly and perhaps explain to you further what you obviously do not understand.


    It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare. ~Mark Twain

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  18. Anonymous just continues to make my point for me. Cowardice doesn't even begin to describe your last post. You are just adding to the delusion this piece of garbage lives in. Are there really people in this world that will defend anything just to do it? Anonymous may want to find a more worthy cause to support because I can tell you, "FROM EXPERIENCE", that this excuse for a man will disappoint you just like he does his daughters. UNLESS... this blogger’s "ex husband", who may have "stumbled" on to his ex-wife's blog, would defend a hopeless drunk when they have NO "first hand knowledge" of the situation? Continue to defend a person you don't know and live in your own little vacuum you call "a life".

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  19. HAHAHAH - BLESS YOUR UNEDUCATED HEART. You are truly very funny, and so very clueless. As I've said - "where is your first hand knowledge" hearsay! LOLOLOLO THESE POSTS are getting more interesting with every response. Which, is what a blog is for. As I've said - I don't care about you, her ex-husband, her situation or anything else to that matter. As for bashing - just what are all of you doing???? Hmmmmmm... In any case, GOD BLESS YOU and EVERYONE making these posts! Have a very blessed weekend! Opinions are simply wonderful, are they not???? Oh yes - just to make a small point here - "he won't pay for his kid?" So what - SHE (AS AN EX-SPOUSE) IS GETTING CHILD SUPPORT...so why does it matter? Regardless of what (she says) his daughter is asking, it is her mother's duty to take the high road...but then that would take some rational thought! Again, God Bless you all. Again - I so enjoying reading the various comments from everyone. So easy to go back and reflect. Thank you for the written information.

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